sublou: the-internet-addict: thedoctorandgallifrey: barrett-the-babe: charile: i hope you hit post limit I hope your gravestone is in comic sans I hope instead of going to hell you go to 4Chan I hope half of your otp dies you just went a bit too far
So is Thought Catalog gonna grow up with me? Like will I be 43 and get all kinds of articles about “How to de-stress when you’re a divorced black woman your 40’s”? Or are they just gonna rotate columnists?
I'm Addicted to PLL in a sad way
Me: Watching this episode of Pretty Liars is making me think I like dumb shit. I should probably stop.
KP: Don't you dare! PLL is okay to like.
Me: Used to be. I'm getting sick of these girls acting like they don't have a whole entire crime to solve. Bang your boyfriend later!
Me: Like I am genuinely scared for you and you are lolly gagging in bed with your boyfriend all day?
KP: Don't be hating because they have someone to lolly gag with.
Me: When one of them is dead in the gutter we will all be singing a different tune.
KP: Perhaps you are a tad over-involved...
Me: One of us has to be.
KP: By one of us I hope you mean you and me and not them.
Me: Take it how you will
phiLOLZophy: Five Philosophical Lessons as... →
philolzophy: 1. “It is better to be Socrates dissatisfied than a pig satisfied.” John Stuart Mill said this to illustrate that it’s better to indulge in high order thinking with an open mind but not have a totally cakewalk life than it is to have all of your basic needs fulfilled but no mental…
fatwasandfanboys: I. To love a woman is to see all the ways in which she is more than metaphor or silhouette. II. To love a woman is to call her with an open palm, not with your index finger.
Who The Eff Is One Direction?
The US is abuzz about One Direction this week. I’m not going to lie and pretend I looked into why. I assume the band is releasing their album in the US this week or something. Since it seems I’m the only person on the planet who thought One Direction was the show choir on Glee until this week, I won’t go into detail on who they are. These were five general thoughts I had after...
safyhallanfarah: My demographic is the ‘levels lazy criticism at the choir while eating pizza’ demographic.
They did that Disney Princess/Real Housewives thing on an episode of So Random before so…
Five Artists I Just CANNOT With
I’ve tried. I have really tried. I don’t get it. 1. Adele I will give it to Adele, that she is a brilliant songwriter. I just never want to hear her sing her songs. “What are you talking about Adele has such a beautiful voice?” I get that all of the time and I disagree. Adele has a powerful voice, but sheesh I’m not trying to hear it mixed in with my Top 40 all of...
Five Things I Have Low Tolerance For
1. The radio version of You & I by Lady Gaga There aren’t many songs I enjoy on Born This Way. I do however enjoy You & I. So imagine my disappointment when my listening experience is destroyed by Q102 or whatever the fuck other radio station adds the name of their state in the place of Nebraska. WTH? It was one thing with New Jersey, because whatever. It’s Jersey. But when...
wellalright: weird how you could take all the photos on a celebrity’s phone and sell them for a ton of money or you could take all the photos on my phone and have a bunch of pictures of food i’ve eaten. Or drinks I’ve consumed.
Five Very Vague Things I Want To Say To Five...
1. I don’t like you all that much. 2. I love you. 3. No. 4. Yeah, you are really REALLY gonna regret that one. 5. He’s obviously cheating on you. Get your head in the game.
Five Things I'm Thinking While Watching 3 Ninjas
Friday night of champions 1. Emily is BUSTED. I know that’s not nice, but she’s like a damsel right? Then she should be a hot 11 year old? 12 year old? How old are they? 2. Emily asks “what’s going on” a lot I swear, if you leave out every time she asks Rocky “what’s going on?” she only has 4 lines. 3. Schneider is one of the top villains from...
I'm back bitches!
Five things you should prepare for: 1. List spam (I have a ton of them) 2. Commentary on stuff that happened a month ago (I’ve been keeping a physical list of lists to make) 3. To be like “WTF Hunter?” 4. To laugh (The WTF is slightly entertaining) 5. To be enlightened (not really)
Also, while I'm here
Sorry I haven’t been blogging these past week. Here’s a picture of Elton John ugg mugging Madonna. Be entertained.
I was gonna make a list of things I thought about today, but I could only come up with three. Legit. This wedding video has consumed my life. I don’t even have time to think.
Top five regrets of the dying
nevver: I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. I wish that I had let myself be happier. more
My cat likes to come in the bathroom while I...
Five Ways I'd Answer The Question, "Are you okay?"...
1. I attempted to go to bed early last night and got 2 hours of sleep max. What do youu think? 2. There was no new How I Met Your Mother episode last night. What do youu think? 3. Refer to this diagram: It’s Shark Week*. What do youu think? 4. I am losing ALL of my Words With Friends games. What do youu think? 5. I made an angus bacon cheeseburger for lunch, so meh. I’ll be...
Five Things I'm Gonna Do Tonight That I'll Regret...
1. Going to Bible Study Now I’m a frequent Sunday morning-afternoon church goer. I love it…I like it. Keeps me in check. But one thing I’ve never done is gone to a bible study conducted on a weeknight. I was strong-armed really. 2. Drinking Directly From the Cocktail Shaker I had a tough, long, awful day. Glasses are for bitches. 3. Drinking Directly From the Cocktail Shaker...
How You'd Feel If You Knew How Much Hamburger...
1. Shocked 2. Disgusted 3. Curious 4. Concerned 5. Disappointed - Because I plan to continue this trend next week.
5 Things You Need To Know About Those Born In The... →
I am a dragon. Take note.
Five Songs You Don't Need To Know The Words To
1. “Only Wanna Be With You” by Hootie and the Blowfish You could insert any Hootie song here, because a great deal of the time I have no idea what he’s saying. But with this being their most popular song, everyone gets the pardon. The only part I know is “Ionlywannabewithyouu” and I usually insert it where it doesn’t belong.* 2. “September” by...
Five Things I Wish I Were Doing Right Now
1. Taking a bath A problem that could be easily solved by me getting out of this chair and running bath water. Yeah, I’m just gonna sit here. 2. Having a drink Curse you Mamrie Hart! Every time a new YDAD is posted I…believe you. And God knows I don’t really deserve a drink. I was out of pocket a few nights ago and still haven’t recovered. 3. Eating sushi This is a...
Five Ways I SHOULD Answer The Question, "What have...
1. I read all of The Hunger Games books…twice. Screw grad programs. I could write a dissertation on the mood swings of Katniss Everdeen. 2. I have started and completed at least 6 new TV obsessions on Netflix. You know, while I was in school I hadn’t nearly enough time for the wonder that is online tv. I gave up on shows, ignored the release of new movies. My social life was too...
Five Ways I Answer The Question 'What have you...
1. “I’ve performed a rigorous job search starting in the area and branching out slowly but surely.” Rigorous is a strong word. 2. “I’ve been volunteering my time with multiple organizations.” Half true. Mostly because I have volunteered with a few organizations, but “I’ve been” makes it sound like something continuous. It isn’t. 3....
Five People/Groups That Hate Me In this Barnes &...
1. The elderly couple reading garbage magazines that got up and left soon after I sat down. 2. The woman who got a stack of books about creative beading, sat for 30 minutes, looked at one and then smiled politely as she walked away. She smiled with her mouth. But with her eyes she said, “stop typing so loud, texting your friend and looking at soft porn on Tumblr.”* 3. The girl I...
Five Predictions About Tonight's Episode of Pretty...
Based on Last Week’s Episode That I Never Blogged About 1. Jenna won’t be in this episode Because where’s this bitch been? All I ever see is Garrett on one end of the phone bitching her out. Did the actress (whose name escapes me) bail on the show? 2. Mr. Fitz’s lip will still be busted Just in case we forgot that Mike decked him in the FIRST EPISODE. 3. Spencer will...
Five Comments on Last Week's 2 Broke Girls
Since there’s no new episode tonight. 1. The way they set Oleg up for jokes is so basic. That’s all. 2. Tampies. Last week was all about tampies! First 2BG, then Grace revisited her instructional on tampie application. Then I got my period. #overshare 3. Chestnut was smoking with Lord Tubbington. I lol’ed what’s with people making jokes about pets smoking? 4. The...
Five Questions I Have About TV Tonight
1. Why isn’t HIMYM on? 2. Why is Gossip Girl still after these Upper East Side hoe’s? I haven’t watched since season 3, so I have NO IDEA! Who is this BITCH? 3. How exactly does one use a Lundy Law app? Is that a local thing, or is that a nationwide thing? I figure it’s local. 4. If JZ don’t STOP PLAYINGGG (Not a question, but c’mon)! Okay, I actually saw...
Five Things I Saw This Weekend
1. Three different cars with Rudolph noses. So mad. I guess they remembered to take off the antlers and forgot that they had ugly red noses on their grills? Or maybe they just think the red nose is voguin? Maybe they have plans to pimp their ride like a clown!! 2. My recently divorced aunt trying to catch a bouquet to Single Ladies. It was an embarrassing moment for us all. 3. The first hour of...
Five Random Things I Hate
My Thought Process While Watching Imagine Me & You 1. When people play Dance Dance Revolution in movies. Because it actually looks like they’re dancing. When I play I look like I’m trying to stomp on a bug. 2. That I’m not in London right now. I saw Primrose Hill and my heart broke. So beautiful. And then there were all of these great shots of the Tower and that awesome...
Five People/Groups I Hate in This Barnes & Noble...
1. The girl who used to work in the Starbucks. Please, leave the counter. I don’t care about your boyfriend or your new Job at Brew Haha! 2. The Couple who I assume are doctors in an embarrassingly racist way. Mid to late 30’s. they guy is tall, white, with just enough gray to make him look refined. The woman is petite and Indian. Both good looking. Neither super well dressed, but...